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When the checkered flag stops waving, should you finish?   
03:08pm 16/12/2008
  The other day
I was driving home
up third street.
The road was sandy
from the rain
the previous night.
I turned the corner
onto Hillside
and saw an old man
in a motorized scooter
waiting
for something;
the mail,
perhaps.
It made me think
of the old man's routine.
Does he have an alarm
that sounds when
the mail is expected?
Does he enjoy
the lonliness
of fresh air.
Does he hate
the smell
of his bedroom,
his living room,
his bathroom?
Does he detest the sight
of those he lives with
to the point
that strangers are more
interesting.
Although,
there is probably
a familiarity
between him and
the mailman.		  
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Checks that bounce aren't made of rubber   
02:57pm 11/11/2008
  "The pen is your paintbrush; lift it to the paper. That is your canvas." listening to empty suggestions along with other facets of advice leaves life as a mundane equation of variables created from an unknown language.

I finished reading "The Best of Lovecraft" and am now reading "The House on Mango Street". This book seriously sucks. It is almost like writing from the perspective of a lost identity has become a common motif. Writing about life within a latino neighborhood and assigning that perspective with sincere qualities, and the innocence of someone who doesn't know life on both sides the of socio-economic barrier, becomes repetitive when you have read similar books.

It all sounds like a Gary Soto poem. The diction is plain but powerful. The tone is slow and thoughtful; somewhat nostalgic, but not reflective. I would venture to say that it is a collective unconscious that is being tapped into.

I don't like this because I feel the lifestyles and struggles of a culture should be varied within their presentation. Acclimating your writing to what sells does not benefit everyone. "The People of Paper" by Salvador Placentia is an awesome example of relaying aspects of the latino culture without being trite and sounding like a Gary Soto rip off. (although I don't know who came first, Gary Soto or Sandra Cisneros).		  
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09:51am 28/09/2008
  Sometimes when I read
I notice that others have chosen to write.
Abstractions run rampant
Across an opaque meadow of dreams.
The concrete is left wanting.
I'm tired of comparisons between
feelings and nature.
There is enough in the world
to keep one's interest
with only it's concrete merit.
i.e. "the shade under the eucalyptus
sustains the moisture on the sidewalk
left by the morning sprinklers."
Language can work wonders
when it is used for the simplest of tasks.		  
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Should've known better   
10:17am 11/09/2008
 
mood: content
Last night I was on itunes and put it upon myself to download some lectures from itunes-U. I downloaded a couple and have listened to them, but there is a fleeting sense that these lectures are useless. I wanted to use them, initially, in class. I think that my students would benefit from hearing college professors discuss certain pieces of litereture. I'll probably use Questia as well since they are a pretty good resource tool. I was looking up articles regarding "Bleak House" and found that they actually have the entire book online in their library.

I've also been going crazy when it comes to getting new clothes. Marshal's and Ross are both my own personal Meccas. Yesterday I bought a pair of Perry Ellis pants for 10.99. Can you believe that shit. I didn't want to take the tag off so I could show off what a great deal I got. I almost bought a new shirt and tie as well, but I didn't want to get carried away. Earlier when I was at Best Buy I saw student from a class that I had observed in, awkward, Especially since I was looking at video games.		  
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Teach this   
02:58pm 27/08/2008
  "Wow, you don't say."

Today I started the student teaching process. I went to a meeting in which all teachers were in attendance. It was quite welcoming and I feel pretty excited about student teaching. My cohort leader started coming across in a much more friendlier manner as well. I've never really talked about it but when I'm at a school, such as when I observed at Norco, I feel like I'm where I'm supposed to be. That type of environment and interconnectivity within a school is something I miss. I'll probably end up being one of those teachers that wears the school's colors on fridays and goes to every football game. Gay, but fuck it, I want to be happy.		  
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Go Sharks!!!   
12:06pm 25/08/2008
  So I got placed to student teach at Santiago. I might end up a Citrus Hills, but I'm not sure. If I do end up at Citrus Hills then I'll be on a year round schedule and Andy will be their. If I stay at Santiago then I will be on Block scheduling. I start this Wednesday by going on the in-service days. It should be fun.  
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It might be waste of money   
11:41am 18/08/2008
  It might be a waste of money but I signed up for Questia, which is an online journal database. I'll probably cancel after the first month is up, however It does seem like it will be useful when making lesson plans. It is twenty dollars a month, so I probably won't be a member for too long, but we'll see where this road takes me.  
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This weekend will be pretty AG   
11:17am 06/08/2008
  This weekend, starting on Friday, will be pretty good. The drinkfest and potluck are sure to please. Then on Saturday the fight should be good, not to mention the free dinner at the Macaroni Grill. Then on Sunday just chill and study for my quiz on Tuesday. I'll probably also watch "I love Money" with Mandy.  
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Why do celebrities sell pictures of their children to the highest bidder?   
09:14am 05/08/2008
  Well well well, school is definitely taking up a lot of my time lately. Last night I played a little Lego Indiana Jones and then read for school for a couple of hours, or it seemed like a couple of hours. I checked my bank account today. It's a pinch lower than I'd like it to be so I think for friday I'll just hit whatever is on sale at Albertson's. The truth is I'm just gonna be getting wasted anyway so having expensive booze will kind of be a waste. Jager bombs and beer bongs. I'm seriously going to get annihilated within the first half an hour.

The fight this Saturday should be pretty good. My prediction is Herring over Lesnar, Florian over Huerta, and Fitch over St. Pierre. I want Huerta to win but Florian has been doing so good lately that it makes me uneasy. St. Pierre will probably beat Fitch and hopefully Herring will beat Lesnar so Dana White will look like a fool.		  
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Hickory Joe's sounds good right now   
11:04am 30/07/2008
  My two summer school classes started this week. Neither of them seem really hard. What sucks is that I have to buy a book that is $109 for a five week class. That averages out to $10.90 per class session. I've been busy doing the inventory for the distribution center. This is what has kept me from LJ the past couple of days. I will try to be as loyal as possible but I may not be as consistent as usual.  
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I like looking forward to Mondays   
03:56pm 25/07/2008
 
mood: anxious
On Monday the windshield people will come out to my house and fix my the two nicks on my windshield. I received these on Thursday on my way to work. They're not that major right now but I want to nip them in the bud so I don't have to replace my entire windshield. I wouldn't want to anyways, but I heard that policemen pull you over if your windshield looks like a spiderweb. If there is anything awry with my car I try to fix it as fast as possible because if I don't It'll weigh down my thoughts. I wanted to get it taken care of today but that didn't work out. Till Monday then!		  
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I wonder if Slipknot change their own diapers   
02:45pm 24/07/2008
 
mood: annoyed
The short answer section of my Ling 20 final is over, actually the entire class is over. I kind of want to go home and sit and watch Netflix, but I have to fulfill my social demands and go out to sushi. At least it will be all you can eat. The place itself sounds kind of gimmicky, but I can't really complain since I'm going to North Woods on Saturday. Even though it's not what I really feel like doing tonight I'm gonna try to have a positive attitude. The reality is it that it is only one night and once I'm through it will be easy sailing till Monday. There is also the possibility of having a good time, which would be nice.		  
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Linguistics and studying are kind of a waste   
01:04pm 23/07/2008
  Today I took the multiple choice section of my Ling 20 final. I've been studying for the past two days for this test but when the test was placed in front of me and I read the first question all I could think was "Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck." It seemed that everything that I was supposed to study wasn't on the test or I studied incorrectly. Some of the things I did know, others were more difficult but I think I figured them out through deductive reasoning, but there were some that I didn't know what the fuck was going on. Hopefully I got a high or mid-range B. I feel much better about the short answer section because I don't think it will cover as much as the multiple choice test. I think the problem was that I got so used to doing well without trying to hard that I didn't take the final as serious as I should have. Because of that I probably won't get an A on it.

I'm also currently reading three books: Proust's Way, Swann's Way, and the best of H.P. Lovecraft. I've been having some ideas for stories pop into my head. One that stemmed from reading Proust that is based Marcel's complaint about the "Infirmity of my nature." I also have a story brewing in my head that arose from listening to the Decemberists and reading bios on Lovecraft.		  
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Ohh yes... now I'm done   
04:17pm 21/07/2008
  Saturday was entertaining considering I was involved in my first hit and run. To be more specific I was the one that was hit and the other car ran. no serious damage was done, however I do wish the guy who hit me could have been more admirable and pulled over instead of driving off the freeway.

In other news Anderson Silva put the beat down on James Irvin. Nothing shocking. The other fights were pretty good. The Brandon Vera fight sucked. I hate that guy so much. He is beyond irritating. His fat ass cut down to 205 and he still didn't look that yoked. He just looked drawn out. He needs to do some curls then eat some chicken.

It would be badass if if Anderson Silva and Brandon Vera fought at 205.

Today I was a little stressed because I had to pay my AAA membership fee. I totally forgot about it till this weekend. It was actually due today. I just went down to my local AAA office and paid it off there. Then on my way back to work I cut this guy off a little (to be honest I haven't been driving too well lately, I often find myself drifting into other lanes). The funny thing about it was that he didn't flip me off, which I probably deserved, but instead looked at me and gave a hand/shoulder shrug that made him look like he was saying "What are doing?", but in a confused manner rather than an angry one.		  
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My PMT loaner is leaky   
11:40am 18/07/2008
  So today I filled the forklift's battery with water. I want everyone to know that I've never done this before, nor have I been trained in the components of large batteries. I overfilled the fucker. I didn't even notice until I moved it and saw the puddle of water where it once stood. So then I had to clean it up without disrupting too much dry battery acid. I really didn't want to breathe that shit in. I tried to pull the battery out to clean off the top but it seriously weighs a ton (no figurative language here, it probably actually weighs a metric ton).

The whole thing is frustrating. We've had problems with batteries before and they're expensive to fix. The battery itself costs 2000 dollars.

However, everything is done now. I think the excess water came out as it was charging. I just have to wait for the wacky mechanic to arrive and put in the new fuse.		  
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I have an Office Depot Coozy   
04:18pm 17/07/2008
  So today there hasn't been too much excitement. The best part so far has been Mandy's Waldo outfit. Class went by as usual. When I got to work I straightened up the first aisle. Then, at the end of the day, a guy from toyota came to work on our forklift. He was kinda weird but I think most mechanics share that trait. Anyways, I felt like an idiot because I haven't been checking water on the battery. So now I have to fill the battery with water in the morning and charge it afterwards. I don't know why I feel bad about it. I probably won't after I leave work. Its kinda like getting away with something for a long time and then inevitably getting caught. Dealing with the forklift is very gay.  
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My current default pic on Myspace is "Medically Unfit".   
01:56pm 16/07/2008
  So yesterday Rampage Jackson apparently went on a true rampage in Newport Beach. Supposedly he hit two cars on the 55 then got off and in the process popped one of his tires. He proceeded to drove around Newport, weaving in and out of traffic and occasionally driving on the sidewalk. One report on Fox Sports said that he lost control of the car due to his disintigrated tire (that can't look good for Toyo Tires). Anyways, he ended up hitting one more car directly and another inadvertantly when his tire remnants flew off; all the while putting the lives of pedestrians in danger.

He ended up pulling over and surrendering to the police but was then rendered "Medically Unfit" to go to jail. What the fuck does that mean. He should have been rendered "High as Fuck."

I think the reason he did this was due to the fact that he felt bad that he didn't give fans a good show in his fight with Forrest. This fiasco is his own way of making it up to the fans and showing that Rampage can still rampage.		  
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Thief!   
02:57pm 15/07/2008
  So last night I looked under my car and realized that my muffler was fine but my catalytic converter was missing. Someone stole my catalytic converter from underneath my car. What kind of stupid faggot would steal something off of my car. If anyone knows what my car looks like then you know how stupid and how gay those people must be to rip off the can-can. The upside is that it will only cost $138 dollars to fix.

In other news I found a community on LJ that requires people to post a short passage, but somewhere within the passage you have use a certain line or sentence that everyone has to use. I sounded interesting but what I didn't think of was that once I added them as my friend that everyone's post on the community would show up when I looked at my friends page. None of people on that community are my friend. I don't want to see their posts when I look at my friends page. So got that straightened out and now everything is great!		  
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Ima Robot sing about these cars.   
01:08pm 14/07/2008
 
mood: aggravated
So today when I got into my car and started it up I noticed that it was much louder than it normally sounded. When I started to accelerate I heard a scraping sound as well as my engine increasing in volume. So I backed up and got out of my car to see what the problem was. To my surprise what appeared to be the muffler was hanging down much lower than it should. I don't know how this happened. When I got home at 5:30 on Sunday there wasn't anything wrong with my car. I think that some fucking kids were outside playing and somehow knocked my muffler loose.

So hopefully it can be repaired inexpensively. If the cost goes north of 350 then I might have to look in to getting a new form of transportation. I've had a boner for a Mini Clubber, or Cooper for that matter. The problem with these is that they're too expensive for me right now. If I didn't have to pay for school and could work full time then it might be possible. I've also been running the Jetta notion in my head. I'm pretty sure that was the car that Mandy and I drove to Vegas and we got there on 3/4 of a tank. It would be very womanly if I bought a V-Dub Jetta but the MPG would be worth it, however I do think that Jettas are expensive as well.		  
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"There was a film of oil on the surface of the water."   
12:47pm 11/07/2008
 
mood: thoughtful
Today I went out to lunch with two spa attendants, a maintenance guy, my boss, and my co-worker. It was a party of six, but it was pretty fun. It reminded me of the old times at GIHS when I used to say gross shit to new spa attendants just to make them uncomfortable. Ashley, one of the spa attendants, said that she still tells people what a Strawberry Shortcake is. That made me smile. I've forgotten how life can be when you are a spa attendant, but I wouldn't go back to it.

I keep wondering about writing and where to go with things I've written. So far I only feel really good about my sci-fi story. This other story I've been working on doesn't even feel right anymore. Its about a father and son re-connecting through the process of taking the grandfather's ashes to Wyoming. I think there is a story there but I'm not ready for it. I havent even mapped out the events that will bring them closer together. I feel like abandoning the story. To make a story like that work you have to give it something fresh; something beyond quirkiness and a strong sense of humor. My grandpa always tells me I need to develop a strong character and then write a series about them. I never wanted to believe him but he is right. I need a character that is more than just someone trying to find their way in life. Most of my stories revolve around that type of character (hmmm autobiographical maybe?). The truth is I keep reinventing myself into the characters within the story. I need to approach it from a different perspective. I need to incorporate my own attitudes into the subtext and not on the character's surface.		  
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